The Bends

I had thought on it, all day and into the early evening. Why was it bothering me so much that you should spend your countless hours with him, and seem to revel in my absence, but when I asked for you by my side it was counted out only in the hour. As it that would met sastisfaction to my soul. I found it out, traced the rat scent back to its source, you denied me comfort. Saying only strangley that it was only I you ever wanted for. That it was only my love for which you thristed.

But pray my sweet, spare me the half truths. You don't even sense your deciet, so rich it runs. Let me spell it out for you plainly. You have a problem with priorities. You have an infatuation with romance in the star crossed sense. Let me put it to you plainly, you are not interested in lasting love, if in in lasting love you cannot commit. You are interested in quick bonds, and tumble weed friendships. Each new friend you aquire is not unlike the last, you pour yourself heart and soul into the connection until the ground brakes under your fragile feet giving way to landslide. Wanting to achieve what it takes others lifetimes to emcompass you file away every secret, every heartfelt truth, and you bare all, sending countless hours to capivate their attention; to arrest it; to possess it as if for all eternity.

Silly girl, gentle debutant, don't you know, the one whom bears wilted corsage for your innermost self has been waiting all these wiles. You give yourself away, doting on conncetions that are superficial and prone to misgivings and falling outs. All the while, I steadfast cling to your love. But for what? Another week surrendered to your independence or mine. And all the while you loose sight of me. Your love, your future wife, the mother of your children, the spinster that will tend your grave faithful. Have you no favor bodily or otherwise to spend in my direction no longer? Have I lost my luster for the gleam of distance jewels? Do I not posses the right parts to keep your affections near my heart? Can you speak on it but a little?

Lady love, I beseech thee, give me reason to stay and I will chain my heart to yours gladly as always. If you want for depth of friendship, for a bond unwavering, for kinship such should never fall to questioning, look no futher than my gaze. You pour your affections into bonds ill spent, they do not love you as I do. They do not long to know your spirit as I do, but hunger only selfishly, hanging themselves upon your pride and virtue. I was ill spent but to tell you thus, I love you so much that I hunger for more after every kiss rather than flee. I have run in the past, but always returned to your side. Ever your sire, I pray you will be reminded of the tokens of my love.

You seek to drive me out to jealously's end. I warrent it not. My lady truth, please, hear me: if you should want for companionship that never waivers let me be thy enternal friend and lover. If there was ever a more deserving soul for this favor, let their name be known now. But if you bid me farewell, then say it loudly, so that my half graced ears might hear you clearly and hanging my head, retreat into the darkness whence I came.